Friday, August 7, 2009

Should I Invite Her to Dinner?

Lynette "Squeeky" Fromm has been released from prison. The prison is only about 15 minutes from my house. Should I invite her to dinner to be neighborly?

Now if you all remember your history, You'd know that Miz Fromme was one of Charles Mansons girlfriends way back a long time ago. What is the proper way to interact with someone who tried to assassinate a president? Just ain't all that easy to answer.

Now I'm sure Miz Lynette is just about starved for some homecookin. After all, the stuff they serve in the joint ain't about to make 'Bon Appetit' any time soon. I just wanna be real dang careful not to upset the woman. I mean.. If I serve mashed potatoes is she gonna start digging through it with her fingers lookin for ground up glass? If I use real cutlery, will she commence to start carvin' another X into her forehead at the dining room table?

Should I serve Wine with dinner? Should I do like prisoners do and make the wine in the toilet to make her feel at home? Lord knows the girl is gonna feel out of place for awhile. Maybe I'll just fill the toilet with ice and chill the bottle in there.. yup.. that'll have to do.

Well, we will see if she will come by, She's gonna be in the neighborhood I'm sure and it would be downright rude if I don't at least ask her. I'll let you know how it goes.

P.S. I'll just be sure to leave some Murphys oil soap in the cabinet above the wall oven just in case she tries to write "Helter Skelter" on the walls with the pickled beets.. or something...


Mary said...

Oh LOL.... just the thought of it all scares me to death! ;)

Charley said...

You are a very funny man Bill!!!!


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I'm 50 year old man who prays he won't take anyone out with him when he finally loses it. Copyright 2009, 2010, 2011, 2012